Tips for Taking Someone with Dementia to the Doctor
September 30, 2025
According to new research, the average time between the onset of symptoms and an official diagnosis of dementia is 3.5 years. That can mean a lot of doctor appointments, both in pursuit of a diagnosis and as your loved one’s condition progresses. When someone with cognitive decline goes to the doctor, they may not accurately describe their symptoms out of shame, fear of a diagnosis, or simply because they can’t recall their symptoms. Eventually, many people with dementia require someone else to take them to medical appointments so that family members and health care professionals have accurate communication.
You will need your loved one’s consent to accompany them to a doctor’s appointment. While it’s not necessary to have health care power of attorney to accompany someone to the doctor, it’s something you should seriously consider putting in place. As dementia progresses, the person affected loses their capacity to make legal decisions for themselves. It’s hard to know when exactly this happens, so it’s wise to make those legal preparations as early as possible after a diagnosis.
Here are some ways to make a trip to the doctor easier on people with dementia and their caregivers. Remember, dementia symptoms and behaviors can vary widely from person to person. You may choose to adjust these recommendations to better suit what you know about your loved one’s condition.
Before the appointment
First, schedule the appointment strategically during a time when your loved one may be most agreeable. Be prepared with a list of your questions and concerns, as well as a list of medications and supplements.
Make sure that your loved one understands that you will be there to make sure they get the best possible medical care.
Talia Chipman, Community Relations Director at Fieldstone of Puyallup, advises dementia caregivers to try to find a local dentist or doctor to minimize travel time and reduce agitation.
Contact the office ahead of time. Inform the medical staff about your loved one’s dementia diagnosis and any specific needs they might have. Many offices can accommodate requests such as shorter wait times, quieter exam rooms, or allowing you to wait in the car until called. There may also be medications available to help your loved one relax during the appointment. Discreet communication with staff ahead of time ensures all the people involved in your loved one’s care get accurate information without your loved one feeling embarrassed.
During the appointment
Be prepared to offer details about changes in behavior, eating habits, or routines. Stay calm and positive. Your loved one will pick up on your emotions. Speak in a reassuring tone and maintain a calm demeanor, even if they become confused or agitated. Don’t hesitate to ask questions or request clarification about treatment recommendations. You know your loved one best and can provide valuable insights about what approaches work at home.
If necessary, use distraction techniques. Engage them in conversation about pleasant memories or interests while the doctor conducts the examination. This can reduce anxiety and make the process smoother.
Finally, ask the doctor about any resources that could assist your journey as a dementia caregiver. They may be aware of community supports, such as adult day programs or support groups, that could be helpful.
After the appointment
Summarize any new information or prescriptions and quickly schedule any follow-up appointments while the information is fresh in your mind. Share relevant information with other members of your loved one’s health care team, including specialists, pharmacists, or home health providers. Communicate with other family members about changes in your loved one’s condition or routine.
Support from long-term care
If your loved one with dementia is living in a memory care community, there are likely supports in place to help you handle their health care.
“When someone moves into memory care, it’s a good time to establish a new baseline. We often see residents with many different specialists, and it may be time to scale back,” Chipman said. “Consider reviewing all medications, especially supplements, and whether certain specialist visits are worth the stress they cause. We want to focus on what truly improves their quality of life.”
Telehealth appointments and in-house medical care are two ways that Fieldstone of Puyallup helps their residents get the care they need, from the place they call home.
“Let doctors know your loved one is homebound—there are many in-home care services available. This is their home now, and they’re comfortable here,” Chipman said. “We don’t want to increase stress when they can’t always communicate what they’re experiencing.”
Those in-home services can take place in their room, or from a quiet and private space dedicated for these types of appointments. Fieldstone of Puyallup works with Seva Medical, a physician-owned medical practice dedicated to bringing health care services to long-term care communities. Dispatch Health can provide mobile services including bloodwork, labs, X-rays, and assessments, helping residents avoid visits to the emergency room.
Taking your loved one with dementia to medical appointments requires patience, preparation, and flexibility. While it can be challenging, maintaining regular health care is crucial for their wellbeing. With thoughtful planning and clear communication with health care providers, you can help ensure your loved one receives the care they need while preserving their dignity and minimizing stress for both of you.